That’s me…. with my dad, on the afternoon of my wedding a decade ago. We stood in the archway, ready to walk down the aisle. The music cued and Dad lurched forward to quickly reach the end goal… my future husband, waiting at the altar.
I held his arm and whispered, “Dad, slow down… this is our moment.” He patted my hand and smiled, “Yes, Sandra, it is… our moment.” We slowed our gait, enjoying every step as father and daughter.
Dad recounted that story many times in the last year of his life. He loved telling it… “I was rushing down the aisle and you said ‘Dad, slow down! This is our moment!” And then he’d laugh as he’d never shared the story before.
A girl’s first love is her father, and that was certainly true for me. I was proud to be an Admiral’s daughter. I was always in awe of his accomplishments. Whatever he set out to do,...
We can choose to take our chance, to speak up, and to contribute.
— Seth Godin, The Practice
If you're asking yourself, what have I always wanted to do, but haven’t, you’re not alone. All of us dream of that one thing we’re called to do… Someday.
But last year taught us we can’t always count on “someday,” and there’s never been a better time to accelerate your drive to fulfill your creative destiny.
Why now? Because the creative mind thrives on unrest.
Creativity often emerges during the darkest times.
Authors like CS Lewis, Hemingway, and J. K. Rowling have said some of their best work was born in the midst of struggles. The chaotic brain becomes more alive in its deep-rooted battle to find a new way, to solve the problem, and to survive.
Once you feel the creative yearning it’s already in motion. It becomes part of your DNA. You can shove it...
I never knew my house before… until it became my world.
I’ve walked the rooms a million times over, but I never really appreciated it, or the surroundings I call my neighborhood.
Now, because of Covid-19, it’s my everything. It’s become my refuge, my serenity, my safe haven. It’s become my workspace, my afternoon café, my backyard retreat, and holds a sacred place where my soul lives.
I began taking daily walks to replace the gym. It’s my daily Zen.
Each morning and evening, I venture out, navigating the sidewalks leading to the trails behind my neighborhood. Miraculously, it opens up to a wildlife preserve.
You’d never know it was devastated by a wind-driven fire last October. But it is green again. The wildflowers are in full bloom, and it feels as though I’m seeing them for the first time. Maybe I never noticed when I drove by in my...
People thought I was crazy when I fell hopelessly in love with a man in another state. I had a whole life, a career, elderly parents, and children, all living within an easy drive in Southern California.
Living here was part of my identity, it’s what I knew, and yet every time I envisioned a life with this man, the subliminal question whispered… “could I relinquish my present life and create something new?
Isn’t that the arc of every fairy tale? The woman meets the man who will sweep her off her feet, conquer her problems, and lead her to his kingdom… to a better life.
But I already had a better life. I loved my home, my friends, my community, my job. I was living my “best life.”
But I missed being someone’s partner.
I had a great first marriage… at least for most of the 26 years. The downward spiral happened after the sudden loss of our 16-year-old son.
Some marriages grow stronger in...
I’m certain you can look back on in your life and see times that offer you proof and encouragement to believe in your ability to be resilient.
Maybe you’ve weathered a sudden job transfer or loss of work unexpectedly. Maybe you took a chance on a business that didn’t work out, or maybe you lost money in the housing crisis years ago.
But here you are. Not only did you bounce back, but you bounced forward into your new life.
Why is it new? Because it was something you didn’t necessarily expect and you had to make adjustments to restore or transform it.
After this Quarantine, we’ll all be seeing life through a new lens.
The elephant in the room that looms is this… will my work, as I know it, be gone? But let’s prod this question a little further. Is there a possibility that your work life will be completely changed, or different, or better than before?
Is there a chance that this is an...
How to manifest a better life by cutting ties to old beliefs.
“Our job is not to deny the story, but to defy the ending — to rise strong, recognize our story, and rumble with the truth until we get to a place where we think, Yes. This is what happened. And I will choose how the story ends.” — Brené Brown
I was stuck in my story. I’d told it so many times it was on autopilot. I attached the same words, the same emotion, and the same meaning every time I’d tell it to a new friend.
There were chapters of my life I had decided to view one way and one way only. My thoughts were set in stone, and those beliefs rumbled around for years as the whole story… the complete accounting of my life.
Until I challenged it.
It was this quote that blew my story wide open:
“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the...
“For the writer who’s spent years running away from actually sitting down to do the work.”
I was a secret writer for decades, depositing my thoughts in a journal with dreams of becoming an author one day. But writing a book? That was different. I struggled to commit. I just kept saying “someday…
My husband had done it. He was a successful screenwriter for television and film. From the moment he decided to become a writer, he committed to becoming a successful writer.
I was in awe of his ability to sit down day after day and bring story ideas and characters to life. It didn’t matter if he was under contract with a studio or not, he wrote for the sheer joy of it.
He was as prolific as it gets, with a career that spanned 3 decades, and there was never a time he didn’t write.
-prolific: marked by abundant inventiveness or productivity- Merriam-Webster Dictionary
There are times when my husband would ask, “Are you listening to me?” And I wasn’t… not really.
I’m married now, and it’s the second time around. My life and my focus are very different than it was the first time. I’m secure enough with myself where I unapologetically recognize I need to change.
The problem reared its head when numerous times my husband would ask, “Are you listening to me?” I would have to admit, even though I thought I was, my mind was often far away.
When did I stop listening to him?
It never happened when we first fell in love… my sole focus was on hearing what he had to say. I wanted to drink in every conversation, and I’d remember every word he said.
In thinking about it, I noticed non-listening times would rear up mostly because of stress; my mind wandered trying to find solutions to problems and situations. But also my...
The first time I picked up Brendan Burchard’s best selling book, High-Performance Habits, I couldn’t finish it. I got one chapter in and bailed.
I wanted to be up for the task, but the truth is, at that point, I was exhausted.
A week ago, I’d run out of creative and emotional fuel. I couldn’t think of a darn thing to write about, let alone work on my website or the next email.
Reading has always been my motivational refuel, but I hadn’t read a book in months. My father died not long ago, and grief had taken away my ability to focus. And no the pandemic and all that it represents is flat out killing my enthusiasm for life.
Having experienced a lot of loss in my past, I learned the world doesn’t wait for you to get through a depression or finish grieving. In fact, those life challenges have no predictable timetable at all, neither does this current...
Game-Changing Strategies for Bringing Your Words Back to Life
Isn’t it just the hardest thing to write when you can’t find the words?
Writers Block is a form of overwhelm in the writer’s brain. You think it’s a lack of ideas, but I’ve found it can also be the muddle of too many ideas, or too much self-doubt, or simply the inability to have clarity on why you’re writing at all.
If you search the Internet for “writer’s block,” you’ll discover any number of ways to combat the dreaded stall in writing momentum. Many of the ideas come from wildly successful creative people.
Writer’s block is real. It happens even to the best of writers.
My late husband, David Peckinpah, was a writer for television and film. We couldn’t afford Writer’s Block… it was that simple. A block in writing meant we couldn’t pay the bills. For me, writing is not my main paycheck. I wish it was, but I know for sure, writing...