“Change can happen at any time, but transition comes along when one chapter of your life is over, and another is waiting in the wings to make its entrance.” – William Bridges, author The Way of Transition
I never thought it could happen to me. But it did.
And I’m not alone. A major life change, expected or unexpected, can wreak havoc with your self-esteem and strip you of an identity you spent a lifetime creating.
Until I divorced, it never occurred to me to have a backup plan. For 26 years I’d worked with my husband, a writer, and producer for television, on developing scripts, but I never wrote anything on my own, nor claimed credit for the work I did.
I was proud and comfortable in the role I played as David’s wife, writing partner, creative muse, financial manager, and mother of our four children.
Who are we without our labels?
But who are we without our labels? I certainly...
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
- Maya Angelou
No one arrives at this very moment in time without a past.
In story development, we call it a backstory.
I took acting classes for years in Los Angeles with two notable teachers, Stella Adler, and Jeff Corey. Both were great actors, and both had a remarkable gift to teach other actors how to develop characters that come alive on stage and film.
Jeff Corey was the first to introduce me to the idea of the backstory. He said you couldn’t develop a full character until you know who they are. If the script doesn’t tell you what happened from birth to how they became the character on the page, then you make it up. He also added this tidbit… every character needs to have a secret.
The audience may never know the secret exists, but the actor does. It’s the key to giving...
“Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray.” ― Rumi
All was possible at the dawn of our lives. We popped into the world with a will to survive and the highest calling of the universe… to someday realize our fullest potential.
In the early weeks, we simply had needs. We learned how to convey those needs with a cry, a whimper, or a smile.
As our minds evolved, our creative capacity grew. Ask any child to improvise a story, and you’ll see imagination come alive.
We began projecting our fantasies into the future. We started saying, someday, I want to… As children, we had no doubts. We play-acted, we dreamed, and “someday” appeared as an achievable reality.
As real life sets in, we begin working at the job we trained for in school… or not. There are bills to pay, families started, and obligations that rob us of time to...
“When I go to sleep at night right now, I’m as financially nervous as I was 20 years ago.”- Will Smith, actor
Yep… that’s me, too. Foreboding finances. I know it well.
I first learned about the feelings of “foreboding” from Brené Brown when she said:
“Joy is the most vulnerable emotion we experience. And if you cannot tolerate joy, what you do is you start dress rehearsing tragedy.” –Brene Brown
The dictionary defines “foreboding” as a noun implying:
“fearful apprehension; a feeling that something bad will happen.”
Brown, describes the feeling as “terrifying.” And in the middle of the night, I can tell you, it is.
Foreboding joy for me manifests in my financial life. I rehearse financial disaster in the dark hours of the night. I see visions of my bank...